Me, crazy? Never.

Most of my daily interactions are now with guys. Which you could argue makes me more easy going. But not really because by default, I'm the hormonal and emotional one. And maybe even the token Crazy?

Case in point:

A few weeks ago, I saw some kids roasting an animal on the street. Now I don't need to see a skinned animal on a spit, especially at 8:30 in the morning. Also, the animal had a really concave stomach. My only conclusion: IT WAS A GREYHOUND.

I emailed Koach, LK, CL, all of whom asked if the kids had a permit.

I had no idea. So I went back a couple of hours later to make sure the kids were still there and then I called Public Health. Only, umm... I had the wrong number.

When lunch time came around, I made Boy #1 check things out. He reported that the kids were roasting a lamb.

Which solved the greyhound question, but what about the issue of ROASTING AN ANIMAL IN PUBLIC SPACE AND PROBABLY WITHOUT A LICENSE AND EVEN IF THEY HAD A LICENSE THERE PROBABLY WASN'T A CERTIFIED FOOD HANDLER?

So, again, I called Public Health. Twice. And umm... both times I got the wrong number. Jesus, I can't even play the CONCERNED CITIZEN properly.

None of the boys were too pleased about my phone calls.

Boy #1 said, "It's fine. It's a lamb."

I confronted him: "Do you think I'm crazy? DO YOU THINK I'M CRAZY? I'm just trying to protect the public, the public's health!!!"

Boy #1: "No, no, you're not crazy."

"Good," I said with a decidedly don't-call-me-crazy look in my eyes.*

Boy #2 said, "Justina, don't go against The Meat. It will only come back to bite you in the ass. Remember that time the deli tried to sell you bagels that were 2 weeks past the expiry date?" (Yes, and then I called Public Health on them because WTF!)

Boy #3 said, "You did what? That's it, I'll never ask you out." (How presumptuous of him to think I want to go out with a really attractive guy!)

Koach was the only boy on my side: "Yeah, report those kids." (Though it is likely he just hates kids more than he does offenders of public health.)

*My secret talent is making people say, and maybe even believe, what I want to hear. Note that LK has a special talent of resisting this particular talent of mine. This makes for a lasting friendship.